Dr. Eric's Blog

Dreams of Pooh Bear

Last night I dreamt I was in a place where Pooh Bear was alive and well...

With eyes bright filled with spirit, I dreamed that Pooh Bear, our beloved cat, was alive and well;   running up to me, sitting in my lap...rubbing his face against mine, allowing me to hold and cuddle him.  Happiness and contentment were ours.

That's all I remember and the feelings of connection continue to last throughout this morning. 

We miss him!

Grief and loss

Life goes on!

While we continue to grieve the loss of pooh bear, life indeed does go on.
In my mind, that is how pooh would want it.

Last night Sean and I looked at a lot of pictures of him, remembering him and keeping him alive in our hearts.

This whole process has refocused my attention on death, dying, grief and loss.
The BIG four if you will.....and how significant a process it is.  How it causes us, at least me, to focus on life, relationships, friendships, work.  It highlights for me what is REALLY important and that is one of the blessings Pooh's death has provided me with, and I remain truly great full to him.

So, what is next...well if you haven't heard, "The GET YOUR YEAR IN GEAR" program is filling up...so if you and your partner want to join a group of kindred spirits in making 2007 your best year yet...Then click here to find out more!

This is a two for one special. You and your partner or spouse can come for no additional charge!

Missing pooh!

Grief and loss

Pooh is gone but is ever present in our lives.  he is everywhere; in front of the TV, coming into the kitchen for something to eat or drink.  Visiting me in my office while I am working, laying down with me on the couch while I read. 

This morning there was a missing mouth that wasn't there to be fed....wasn't there to be kissed, wasn't there to be scratched, a missing purr. His presence felt by his absence.

Grief/loss/emptyness...a space that was once taken up with this amazing presence is now emptiness filled only with sadness.

As I climbed out of the shower I stood their for just a moment, time seemed to stand still....experiencing a new me, a me with out the corporal presence of pooh...

Pooh bear past at 4PM today...

It was not as peaceful as we all would have liked...however, it was here at home.

Sean and pooh sharing a last moment together.

 

Pooh bear, our amazingly sweet and kind cat, breathed his last breath at 4PM today.  It was a two step process of a sedative first..which actually caused his demise before the actual injection was given.

Pooh bear threw up quite violently, however, we were there and held him supportively while he finally laid down on his side quietly. 

The doctor administered the final injection and Pooh bear was gone.  Out of pain, out of discomfort and liberated!

He is gone but will never be forgotten.

He was surrounded by me, Sean (my partner) and our loving friend Jacqui.

Thank you all very much for your wishes, thoughts and prayers.

Preparing to say good-bye

Getting ready to say good-bye is as hard as saying it...

Finally, after an exhaustive search we found a vet willing to come to the house to euthanize Pooh Bear.  We have set up the living room with lights of light and his favorite ottoman to lie in during this procedure.  Even some of his and our friends are coming by to be with him during his passing.   

We are very sad and feel very blessed that we have been able to arraigned this so that it could be done here.  No stress for pooh or for us to go to an office some where. 

Tough weekend

Caring for the sick...

This weekend has been very tough more on us than on Pooh!
Trying to make him comfortable, keep on eye on his breathing, checking to see if he is eating and drinking....noticing every little this or that.

Our intention through out the weekend was to simply spend time with him and to make arrangements today for euthanasia.  However pooh has had other plans...he has preferred cool, shady spots in the house that are actually not very close to us.  However he has come out to eat each time we have put new food out for him and at night he still sleeps by my side.

As of this moment, I am waiting for the vet to call.  My hope is that we can do this here in the house and not stress him any further.

Waking up next to pooh bear

When I opened my eyes this morning, there he was...

On my undershirt(that I plopped on the floor last night)curled up in a ball, purring away.  We made eye contact and in that moment, all was right with the world.

Meanwhile, in another part of the house, the morning requests for attention and food began to echo.

As Pooh joined me in the kitchen, I flashed on the movie "Arthur".  When the character Hobbson, Arthur's butler and only true friend, lay dying in the hospital; Arthur had all of Hobbson's things brought to the hospital and recreated his room from home there.  Ordering food from the finest restaurants in NYC, not wanting his last meal to be jello!

While pooh bear is not dining from Le Cirque, It gave me tremendous pleasure to open up a can of albacore tuna for Pooh.  He got up, tail upright and walked right into the kitchen with me.

While he was enjoying his morning snack, I went in to feed the dogs.  They were ecstatic.  You would think that they had never eaten before and that somehow I was this wonderful benefactor!  Once they were taken care of, it was time to feed Buster, the little cat I found a few weeks back.

Now, it's time to go give Oscar, our bird, his morning bit of bagel...such a New York bird!

As I have said, in this moment, all is right with the world...well, maybe not the whole world, but my little world.  Sean and I have taken pictures and will download them later to post.

Pooh bear is home!

Pooh bear is home...

and is enjoying Tuna fish and catnip!
Purring happily hanging around with us, enjoying his usual butt thumping and chin scratching. Aside from the shaved belly(for the ultrasound) and how thin he is, you might never know he was sick. 

However, he is and we have made arrangements with a local Vet to come to the house when the time comes and euthanize him here, so that he and we can all be together where he is most comfortable.

Clearly all this did not happen overnight.

Pooh had been getting thinner and about a month ago we put him on meds for his thyroid problem. 

There were no other indicators that clued us, or the vet, about his advanced condition and yet here we are.

We will be posting more pictures and a little Pooh bear video later....so keep an eye out!

Namaste!

Pooh Bear Update

It's Cancer...

We went to visit Pooh bear (our cat) at the Animal hospital in Pennsylvania yesterday.  We were there for most of the day.

We finally spoke with the doctor who confirmed our suspicions. 
The first option that was offered of course was chemotherapy which Sean shot down immediately as an option and I of course agreed.  Pooh is 14 years old and we see no reason to cause him extra suffering to may be increase his life span for a short time while decreasing his quality of life.

Our current goal is to take him home and spend some quality time together until he is ready to say good bye and then bring him in to be put down.

The challenge is that his chest may quickly fill with fluid again and that we won't be able to do that.

We shall see. 

Will keep you posted....

“I love cats because I enjoy my home; and little by little, they become its visible soul.” ~ Jean Cocteau

Pooh Bear is very sick

Pooh Bear is our beloved cat!

 

For the past 14 years, pooh has been our constant companion.  A wise keeper and sentinel of our home. Now he is at the animal hospital dealing with what looks to be cancer.

A few weeks back we took him to the vet and found our that his blood results were very pretty good except for his thyroid levels which were quite high.  Immediately he was put on medication.

Yesterday he started acting a little out of the ordinary so we took him over again...this time they took and xray and we were not able to see his heart and lungs due to a great deal of fluid build up in his chest.

From there we went directly to the specialist and last night they tapped (with drew fluid) his chest.

The doctor was pretty sure it was cancer but will have it checked further and pooh is due for an ultra sound today.

Even the one day with out him here at the house, seemed very strange.  His presence felt by his absence.  Every night pooh would sleep at the edge of my bed or next to it, each morning when I wake up he would follow me into the kitchen for a morning snack.  last night and today none of those events happened and yet simultaneously I was aware of the memory of the activity and the reality of it. 

Needless to say, we are all very sad about it and are hoping that we will be able to take pooh bear home for a few days before we say good-bye.